Widow – Connections Of Hope

01Nov 2020 by Rachel Greenberg No Comments

Anniversary Time Again…

afterlife, Holidays, Love, Memories, Widow

Fall is anniversary time for me. October 21 was my late husband’s birthday and November 3 our wedding anniversary. I’ll never forget the first Fall after my husband’s passing. He died in the Spring so by the time his birthday came around that first year it’d been 7 months since I was suddenly widowed. He would have been 58 but only made it to 57. I woke up early that day and feeling like a zombie, I walked to the end of the pier where we often visited and left a bouquet of birthday balloons and roses. I didn’t mind if someone took them. I actually hoped someone did. I imagined a down and out person taking a walk at the beach to quietly celebrate their birthday only to find…

23Aug 2020 by Rachel Greenberg 10 Comments

I Used to Think my Loss was the ONLY Loss in the World

afterlife, Love, Memories, Post Traumatic Growth, Widow

After my husband died, I felt like my loss was the only loss in the world. The pain of losing the love of my life was enormous, all encompassing. And, because it was sudden and unexpected, this only added to my mountain of grief. I also was the only one in my immediate family or peer group who had lost a loved out of the order of things. My loss stood out. Glenn was in the prime of life, he wasn’t sick and lived each day with a zest for life like no other. Then on a typical Saturday morning in 2013 he suffered a fatal brain bleed out of the blue while I was out doing errands. The first few months after this I was numb. Then I cried…

09Aug 2020 by Rachel Greenberg No Comments

What you CAN Control

Gardening, goals, Hope, living in the moment, Love, Memories, Widow

I’ve started a vegetable garden during the pandemic. My little garden is located in a local park less than a mile from my home. I often bring my dog, Hannah with me when I go there, which is often. She enjoys chasing the butterflies while I tend to my plot. We are usually the only ones there. It’s peaceful and I feel good when I’m there. My daily worries melt away as I tend to my vegetables and flowers. When my late husband and I first met I had a garden in a community plot like the one I do now but much larger. In that case I was on a waiting list for going on 5 years. My name came up about a month before I met my late…

02Aug 2020 by Rachel Greenberg No Comments

Sunday Morning

afterlife, Fathers, living in the moment, Love, Memories, Uncategorized, Widow

My late husband taught me to enjoy Sunday mornings and his mother taught me the art of lounging before rushing off to start the day. Before I met my late husband, I don’t ever recall staying in bed even for a short period of time before jumping up and out each morning. I don’t know what I was always in such a rush to do, especially on Sunday mornings. Glenn changed this for me, forever. Early on in our romance Glenn would run out on Sunday mornings to buy the New York Times. He would always tell me to stay in bed until he returned. Within 20 minutes he would be back with a fresh cup of coffee from my favorite place and oftentimes with red roses in hand. He’d…

05Jul 2020 by Rachel Greenberg 3 Comments

Slow Leaks

career, goals, Hope, living in the moment, Love, Post Traumatic Growth, Uncategorized, Widow

Have you questioned your self-esteem since your loss? I have. I’ve recently gone through some things that has made me question myself. This is unlike me. I don’t know if it’s all this COVID and all that brings, could be a part of it. I’ve certainly seen my fair share of whacky behavior over the past few months. I’m sure that you have too. Regardless of the cause, I don’t like it. No one wants to feel any unease. We are sensitive beings so we naturally absorb what’s going on around us, whether huge and sweeping like a worldwide pandemic or subtle. It’s easy to quickly get caught up and react to negative situations, feelings and energies. I know that I have fallen victim to this trap. Something happens, I feel…

14Jun 2020 by Rachel Greenberg No Comments

How I Connected with my Late Husband

afterlife, Dreams, Hope, Love, Memories, Widow

Before my husband died I had very little belief in anything afterlife. I thought anything beyond our physical world was “woo, woo,” and wishful thinking. In hindsight this was more of an intellectual idea rather than based on fact or research. I just took it for granted and assumed that when the physical body dies, the light goes out forever. The end of the road. On the other hand, my late husband Glenn was a true-blue believer that we go on after our body dies. He would often say, “I know there is something bigger, better and it’s all about love.” The last time Glenn said that to me was our last night together as we knew it. We were having one of our many late-night conversations in bed when…

26Apr 2020 by Rachel Greenberg 60 Comments

Goals and Living in the Moment

career, goals, Hope, living in the moment, Widow

A lightbulb went off for me yesterday regarding my future. I woke up early and started the day by joining a 6am Zoom meditation group. Since I was up so early, I decided to continue with this early productivity and joined an online yoga class right after. I then took my dog for a long walk and stopped by my community garden plot and did some tending to my budding little project of growing urban veggies. As I walked back home, I felt a sense of belonging to myself. I sense of self-empowerment. Butterflies and chirping birds seemed to be everywhere and for a moment I forgot about this terrible virus and was living in the moment. Then something happened. I started getting a download of ideas for my future.…

19Apr 2020 by Rachel Greenberg 6 Comments

420 (Not THAT “420”…)

Hope, Love, Memories, Widow

Seven years ago tomorrow, April 20th was my late husband’s funeral. A day I never thought I would ever have to face and certainly not in 2013! Glenn Was only 57. Although he passed away suddenly on March 28th, I wanted his funeral to be held in the same location as our wedding and just as perfect, so we had to wait a few weeks for the venue to become available. Glenn and I got married in 2001, just after 9/11. We chose a beautiful sanctuary in the middle of a bustling and somewhat sketchy, Hollywood neighborhood. If you didn’t know about the place you wouldn’t even know its there. The tiny art deco temple/chapel is set amongst one acre of lush tropical plants and flowers. Stained glass windows adorn…

28Dec 2019 by Rachel Greenberg 130 Comments

Goodbye 2019, Welcome 2020

Holidays, Hope, Love, Memories, Widow

Wednesday we will not only be in a new year but also a new decade! I entered the last two decades with my late husband by my side and this time I will welcome the new year and decade without him. I’ll never forget our first New Years together. It was 1999 and everyone was into the Y2K scare. My late husband and I giggled at everyone lined up for bottled water that year even after the new decade had come and gone in other parts of the world without any feared glitches. We thought we had so much time together. We didn’t know what the future held for us but we had a strong bond of budding love at the time and both knew we were in it for…

10Nov 2019 by Rachel Greenberg 60 Comments

Facing Greif Helps, Even Though it Hurts!

Holidays, Memories, Widow

I was recently asked to be a contributing writer for an article about celebrating/commemorating our loved one’s birthdays who have passed. This of course immediately made me think of my own bereavement journey. I’ll never forget my late husband’s first birthday after he passed. It was at about the 6-month mark. The shock had worn off and I was in the midst of staring grief right in the face! It was torture, really. No one prepares you for this. I honestly had silly fantasies about grief that were not reality based. I used to think that something good would happen to balance out all the bad and quickly learned that life doesn’t work this way. Instead, life just keeps moving forward without our loved ones in it. I did however…

Category: Widow